When I was glancing through an article, in Tamil, on my Guru
- Sri Yogi Ramsuratkumar - I was deeply moved to read therein
Sri Swami's pregnant declaration: "I create personalities.
That is the work Father has entrusted to this beggar". How
true it is; and how meaningful too! The holy words, sacred sentences
and elevating declarations pouring forth from his sacred mouth
are Truths and nothing but the Truths. Fortunate indeed are those
who are blessed to recognise this incarnation of Truth - Sri Yogi
Ramsuratkumar - and totally surrender themselves at this altar
of Love supreme.
I am one of those thousands of fortunate beings whose life was
made richer, more purposeful and more beautiful by his glorious
act of giving shelter at his sacred feet. By his affectionate
care, grace and blessings I have blossomed as a Human being! He
became my sole refuge. He truly is the Divine Mother who helps
me, guides me, transforms me and enthuses me to become and be
a responsible mother of three delightful children, all of them
His blessings and prasad to me.
My first meeting with Swami was in 1987, at the Sannidhi Street
house, on the holy Karthigai Deepam night. My elder brother Suresh,
sisters Anuradha and Mala, and Ganesan accompanied me. Sri Swami
received us all jubilantly; and thereby made us feel at ease within
a few moments. This first meeting was unforgettable - it took
place amidst a lot of laughter and full of happiness. It was spiritually
uplifting too, for from the time we sat near him, till he gave
u permission to leave, my whole attention was pivoted on Swami.
Whenever I closed my eyes I saw a "Jyoti' in between my eyebrows.
This gave me an inner conviction that I was in the holy presence
of a "Mahapursha," a Great soul. This sowed the seed
in me for a constant and everlasting contact with my Guru.
During that very first meeting Swami performed an astounding miracle!
In answer to my sister's prayer that Swami should bless me with
a child, I was fortunate that he blessed me by giving a bluish-black
gypsy mala. He took it out from his neck and threw it on my lap!
No need to say I became pregnant.
It turned out to be a caesarian operation. While being taken to
the operation theatre, I wore the Mala and was chanting his name:
"Yogi Ramsuratkumar' continuously. When the doctor began
the operation, though my eyes were closed and I could no more
move my body; I was fully conscious. As such, I experienced excruciating
pain. I kept telling myself that I could no more bear the pain.
Suddenly, I heard Swami's voice commanding me: "Chant 'Ram,
Ram', Go beyond bodily pain". I instantly obeyed Him and
started chanting, "Ram, Ram". Slowly I lapsed into unconsciousness.
This darshan of Swami before the birth of my daughter-child, Shreya,
removed all the pent up fears stored up in me.
When I met him after this, and narrated these in detail, Swami
laughed and said: 'It is all Fathers Grace on Sandhya!".
It is true that Swami did perform this miracle of an inner change
in me, for by nature I was always a serious person, and only after
having darshan of my Guru, repeatedly, did I really start smiling,
I felt pure joy whenever I had his darshan, thereby felt light
and happy.
Another interesting thing happened. Shreya, the child, used to
insist on herself wearing the Mala, whenever she fell sick. During
those moments she would insist that we chant "Sri Ram Jai
Ram Jai Jai Ram". She would fall asleep only holding on to
the sacred mala. So, she was keeping it to herself almost all
the time. One day, I suddenly realised that she had lost the mala;
any amount of searching for it was of no avail. Sometime after,
my mother went to Swami and prayed to Him to bless me with a second
child. A few weeks after this darshan, I miraculously found the
lost mala. The moment the mala was placed in my hands, I realised
that I was pregnant again. Though I could have Swami's darshan
only a couple of times a year, His holy Mala continued to play
an important role of strong contact between me and my Guruji.
Once, I had sent by post to Swami a cutting from a magazine, of
an article on "Paramacharya", the Kanchi Sankaracharya.
I am told that Swami enjoyed reading that article. A few months
later when I went for Swami's darshan, he said that he liked the
article, very much and that he had lost it, but also 'Rediscovered'
it later. He then smiled at me. I immediately felt that he was
referring to the loss and regaining of my Mala. Also, I must confess
here that those few months I had totally failed to chant his name
and that through that incident he awoke me to the continuation
of my chanting His glorious name. My Guru thus showered His blessings
on me. I felt elated and became more bound to His Holy feet.
In my second pregnancy I was carrying twins and this posed different
difficult problems to me. I never stopped appealing through prayers
to Swami, to stay with me and save me. I wore the sacred Mala
during the second operation also. The same experience repeated.
The doctor was cutting open and I was in intense pain as before.
Again, my Guru's voice ordered me to chant "Ram, Ram."
Strangely, I could not do it! In the midst of intense pain, I
suddenly heard the cry of the first baby and then the second baby;
and, then only I could chant, "Ram, Ram". Immediately
after that I lost my consciousness.
After five months, when I could have darshan of Swami I expressed
to Him my disappointment in that I did not instantly obey my Guru's
commandment. He enthused me and removed from my mind such an upsetting
thought by saying: "Whatever happened was perfectly all right,
Sandhya. Nothing to bother. All is Father's blessing! You were
only worried about the babies." He then talked about the
"Speciality of Motherhood". Swami is an embodiment of
Love and Compassion indeed!
Being a mother of three children, constant care and attention
on them was a demand and especially about their good health. Aware
of my predicament, Swami encouraged me by saying "Serving
children is like serving God." The great Matrubutheswara
guiding a mortal mother!
Yet, anxiety, as a mother, continued endlessly. My twin daughters
were born prematurely by a month. Their under-weight, ill health
and suffering affected me deeply. Added to it, my own ill health
and suffering due to the surgery caused concern in me. The twins
were affected with asthma and the attack used to take place at
the same time, demanding my attention on them simultaneously and
in full measure too. So, for one and a half years, my repeated
prayers to Swamiji were only about their health. All along, Swamiji
continued to assure me, in so many ways, that their health would
be all right. Yet, an ignorant being as I am, not being able to
bear the twins suffering with asthma, I pleaded with Swamiji that
I could no more bear to see them suffer. He said with a firm voice
- not once but three times -: " They will be free of asthma".
To this day ( they are 31/2 yrs. old now) there has not been one
serious attack. He continues to prove that He is taking full care
of us, yet due to ignorance we continue to falter. He is relentless
in assuring us that He is always with us. Let us have total faith
in His words, and thus clasp His holy feet in all fervent devotion.
Today, fortunately I realise that my children actually belong
to Him and it is only Swami who takes full care of them. He has
taken away my anxieties and has given the joy of being with them.
He has made me enjoy my children by taking away my anxieties.
My only prayer to Him now is that they chant his nama and remain
His children. He is the real mother, not only to my children,
but to me and to every one who flock to His holy presence.
This Divine Mother, slowly but surely brings out the transformation; sometimes imperceptibly too ! The transition of me - a spoilt child from childhood - to a fully blossomed devotee, utterly surrendered at the Holy Feet of Sri Yogi Ramsuratkumar, truly reflects the glory and grace of this Mahapurusha. Now, when I go for His darshan, the sheer bliss of just being in His presence is all I want. I am enjoying the prema I have for YOGI RAMSURATKUMAR and MA DEVAKI. 1 fail at His sacred feet, again and again and pray to Him that he continues to protect and bless my family.